Kim Cattrall's satisfying sex secrets

When I was eighteen, my first lover was a woman nine years older than myself. The first time we made love, I was very excited and really had no idea what was supposed to happen. She coached me without my knowing it, and the third time we made love she told me that she had an orgasm. I was unaware of her experience and did not know what she meant. How does a woman have an orgasm? What does she feel? Do I have anything to do with it? Can I make it happen? Why was I so unaware of her experience?

I was confused and embarrassed, and decided that I wanted to better my understanding of how women work physically and emotionally, and to become the best lover I could be. Why didn't I just ask her some questions? Very few men are comfortable asking a woman what feels right to her, heightens her experience, and makes her climax. It seems to be something men don't generally do.

Even if a man asks, the woman may be at a loss to explain to him what to do. A woman may know how to touch herself, but very few seem to know what a man can specifically do to excite her and make her come.

Perhaps we fear that if we talk about it, the magic of the moment will go away. Well, not talking about it has created a situation that is not working for many people. I learned a lot about sex from being with different women, and by seeing what worked best for each person. Over the course of time, I became more aware and intuitive, and learned to feel my partner instinctively. It is an awareness that must be developed, but it is available to everyone.

Everything may be right in a relationship, but if sexual satisfaction is minimal or absent, the relationship is likely to suffer. All show and no go is not a promising scenario. It is amazing that in our society we have no tradition of passing along this most basic and vital knowledge -- how to satisfy a woman. After all, when a man truly satisfies his lover, he attains true release for himself.

Kim and I are not doctors or professional sex therapists, but we are two people who are not afraid to talk to each other about what brings us satisfaction in bed. We hope that the material in this book will be helpful to those who want to be better lovers, as well as to those who want their partners to be better at lovemaking. Maybe others will write books that go beyond this one. If so, we will happily read and learn from them. At this point in time, we have not seen a book that contains this material, so we offer ours hoping for the best.

This book assumes that the man has the desire to fulfill the woman, and that the woman wants fulfillment with him. If this is not the case, this book will be of no value and other remedies should be considered.

The real purpose of this book is to help men develop their intuitive abilities and their overall consciousness and awareness of women and themselves. Ultimately, when she is sexually fulfilled, he has one of his greatest rewards.

Copyright 2002 by Kim Cattrall and Mark Levinson