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Asthma is leaving sex life gasping for air
Dear Dr Patti
I'm 31, female and have been married for almost 10 years. I can honestly say that my husband and I are still in love. The only thing that bothers me is my asthma, which I developed about three years ago. We used to have sex almost daily, but I can't do that any more as I'm always wheezing and short of breath. Sometimes we even have to stop during sex because I need my inhaler. My husband is not complaining and tells me that it doesn't matter, but how can I have sex without having an asthma attack?
N
Breathing is a key part of the sexual process, so it's no surprise that this condition is disturbing you on so many levels. The physical strain alone can quell any sexual desire you may have, and the fear of having another asthma attack - or actually having to reach over to grab the inhaler - can put a damper on even a gentle romp.
My first suggestion is to have a long, in-depth conversation with your GP. He or she is the best source of information about side effects from both the condition itself and the medications you are currently taking. Find out whether either of these are causing problems in your sex life, and see if there’s a way you can work round it.
My second suggestion is to take it easy until your mind and body catch up with the ‘new you’. Now that you are asthmatic, you will have to go more slowly. Make sure, with your doctor's permission, that you keep fit, concentrating on building strength and stamina. Sex takes work, energy and plenty of physical exertion for even the slightest hiccup of an orgasm to occur.
Try adjusting your sexual style slightly to accommodate your new limitations. Tie a black lace ribbon around your inhaler as an erotic reminder. Together with your husband, find new ways to create and share sensual, as well as sexual, touch. A candle-lit bubble bath can set the scene for intimacy. Rubbing each other with massage oils can relieve tension, take your mind off your limitations and let you both enjoy intimacy. Finally, taking time, before physically having sex, will help you avoid the problems you have been experiencing.
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