A new survey by DatingDirect.com, reveals 84 per cent of single Brits struggle to find a date
A sprinkling of Latte Creations makes an everyday coffee break extra special
I feel like I’m making love with a dummy
Dear Susan,
My husband is so quiet when we make love sometimes I can't even tell if he has had an orgasm. Now I've become less verbal as it's very awkward whispering sweet nothings to someone who doesn't respond in the same manner. What's his problem and what can I do?
Angie
I don't think there's any problem with your husband not making any noise during sex. Lots of people have a silent style. They feel aroused and appreciative, but they don't express this with words. Maybe they feel embarrassed; or they find that noises and words reduce sensation and pleasure. Instead of moaning and howling, they show their excitement by the rhythm and pace of their movements, their breathing, heartbeat, and in the case of a man, by his erection.
The problem is that your non-silent style differs from your husband's and it is this that makes you feel bad. For you, sex is only good if you can whisper, talk and shout about it. The fact that he doesn't do any of this makes you feel unappreciated.
To sort this problem out, start looking for the signs of appreciation and enjoyment that come naturally to your husband, rather than expecting him to use the signs that come naturally to you. If he has an erection, you can safely say he's enjoying himself. And he will certainly have ways of moving that show when he is aroused. So ask him to tell you about these and look for them yourself.
If you know your husband is getting excited and showing it in the way that's right for him, then you'll find it much easier to get excited too.
Hugs Susan
Delicious
Digg
reddit
Facebook
StumbleUpon
Horoscopes| Message Boards | Quizzes | Newsletters | Join
iVillage Ltd is a UK company registered in England & Wales (3837269) at 80-110 New Oxford Street, London WC1 1HB
