Blame his star sign: why men do the weird things they do

'My divorce came as a complete surprise to me. That will happen when you haven't been home in 18 years.' - Lee Trevino (December 1)

He's honest, trusting, and eternally optimistic. He won't restrict your freedom, or expect you to drop your nights out with friends in favour of staying home with him. He may have a wry perspective on life similar to Mark Twain's or the diplomacy of Winston Churchill. An Archer wants a companion to accompany him on frequent, spontaneous outings to wonderfully diverse places, because to him, life is to be explored and enjoyed.

Before you decide he's your soul mate, understand that a male Sagittarius has the same attitude toward commitment as does his mythological symbol, the Centaur. He spends all of his youth and most of his adulthood in continual heat. He is an accomplished lover, but it's the deed he desires, not you.

You no doubt fell for his smile and talent for quoting Shakespeare while simultaneously unfastening your bra. But, as a partner, he makes a great friend, one you won't see very often because his idea of home is a place to drop in when he needs a change of clothes or a shower. Since an Archer could happily live in a cave for months, eating crickets and contemplating his navel, even if you marry him, you'll feel like you're still single. Don't expect to lean on his shoulder or cling to his arm. Do expect to be his pal (or groupie) and to spend many nights alone. He's neither jealous nor possessive. In fact, he wants you to have a life independent of his because that allows him more time for drinking beer with his mate and following the football. He is the one guy in the universe who was born to be a bachelor. He won't care how you dress, who your friends are, or where you spend your time, as long as you don't bother him with the details. He's too busy elucidating his latest theory for solving all the problems of the world.

Archers have opinions on every subject under the sun, and cannot answer even simple questions with a plain yes or no. Ask if he wants a ham sandwich, and he'll answer with the history of Earl of Sandwich, the 16 different kinds of bread you could use to enhance the flavour of the meat, and a dissertation on mustard.

Michael de Nostradamus, the sixteenth-century French physician and mystic, had the distinct Sagittarian penchant for expounding on the mysteries of the universe. In typical Archer style, the good doctor's visions were not only voluminous, totalling more than 1,000, but were carefully crafted, allowing endless interpretations. This ensured that whatever happened, he could be credited with prophesising the event. Only an Archer would be as audacious and irresponsible as to predict events 2,000 years into the future. And only an Archer could do it with such a flair for the art of bullshit.

A male Sagittarius respects authority, as long as he's the authority figure. Question his right to rule and you'll soon understand the meaning of Jupiter's wrath. He has a nasty temper and his volcanic eruptions result in expensive trips to the nearest DIY centre for wallpaper, nails, and plaster.

He's impulsive. Send him out for milk, and he'll come home with reservations for the midnight flight to Peru. He might invite you along, and then again, he might tell you that since you both know he has more fun alone, he bought only one ticket. If he does take you, you will spend half your time dragging him out of the local hot spots where he's swapping chat-up lines with the natives and the other half tracking him through the jungle as he searches for the meaning of life. You'll be better off staying home hoping he gets kidnapped by pygmies.

The Archer's favourite game is disaster. Tell him the sink backed up, and he'll flood the basement because he forgot to turn off the water before he tore out the plumbing. Ask him to forgo one of his several nights out with the boys in favour of a quiet dinner at home, and he'll rant and rave that you are smothering his need for freedom.

Even lovable Archer Walt Disney had a dark side. Remember all those endearing fairy tales he brought to the screen? Bambi's dead mother and a raging forest fire. The orphaned Lion King stalked by his own family members. Snow White and Cinderella: one with a stepmother who wanted to cut her heart out, and the other who was forced to become a servant in her own home.

Yours will step on your toes, bore you with rhetoric, and hurt your feelings with a thoughtless remark. After all, he is a fire-breathing dragon. But, this man is more like Pete's Dragon, Disney's character who flops along meaning no harm and leaving little lasting damage.