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Women and Power: Understanding Power

By Harriet Rubin

Explore the roots of power and find out how to harness its strength for your own life

Power is the means by which you can get things done. It’s the freedom and opportunity to achieve your dreams. How does one become powerful?

The Princessa: Machiavelli for Women by Harriet Rubin is a women’s version of Machiavelli’s The Prince the classic book of strategy first published in the 16th century. Machiavelli was a counsellor to Renaissance royalty, and his little handbook has become one of the bestselling success manuals of all time. World leaders, generals and corporate executives have followed its advice. But its rules, based on cunning, deceit and dominance, do not work for women. Here, in this two-part series, Harriet Rubin gives us a fascinating insight into her thinking.

Introduction

The study of power begins when we are young. Our teachers in the lessons of power are parents, the schools, bullies and bosses. As girls, we don’t learn to exercise power. We live with it. Power often frightens us. Instead of acting with power, we act against it. We become passive. Instead of saying clearly what we want, we complain or withhold affection. We hint or suggest, whine, tease or even lie. We use power, but mostly in destructive ways, not in ways that win. We could get much more, more effectively, if we weren’t afraid of being outwardly powerful.

There is no shame in being powerful. Powerful people feel good about winning. Developing that feeling about yourself is important.

There has been countless advice for men on the exercise of power. Consider The Prince by Machiavelli or The Art of War by ancient Chinese philosopher-warrior, Sun Tzu or any current book on leadership. All suggest dominance and control. They do not build on women’s preference for nurturing and co-operation. For women there is only one book that describes how to use female strengths to change the game and thereby win in a way that makes the world larger for everyone. I know there is only one such book, because when I was nearing the end of my tether I didn’t know where to turn. To save myself, I had to find the answers on how to achieve power by researching the strengths and strategies of history’s most successful women.

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Comments

Yes- what you say is true. There is a reason why womenare frightened of their own power: patriarchy. Early patriarchs wounded the female spirit and soul - women's voices were silenced and their presence was also diabolicized, (authors such as Barbara Walker, Eckhart Tolle, and the author of the book Switching to Goddess write about this). I write a lot about all this in my book: "The Power in Softness - A Guide to Personal Protection and Empowerment for Women". Sweet runnings, Charly Flower