Office loafing: the art of looking busy

2. Make sure your computer isn't set to go 'bing-bong' every time you have a new instant message!

3. If you use MSN messenger, keep it minimised then you can easily click outside the message box if someone approaches, then they won't be able to see the conversation. Remember 'SOS' stands for 'Someone Over Shoulder'. It is more effective than 'BRB' if you have to suddenly ignore the person you're trying to instant message.

4. If you have to leave your desk to go to the loo or vending machine or for a fag break, take a file with you. It makes you look busy and like you're on your way to a colleague's office to discuss something important.

5. Sticking a pencil behind your ear - always works for builders.

6. Oh, and remember not to look too quiet and busy... remember how mothers with small kids say if the kids are really quiet it means they're up to something REALLY bad.'
HTH

Assume the position
'Keep your internet screen half size and never work at a workstation where people can walk up behind you without you knowing - try and position yourself at an angle so you can see them.'
cl-notforwimps

Secret commands & assignations
'I like the Command Prompt function (under Programs/Accessories). Type a message into the command prompt and press return. It sends an anonymous message to the recipient in the form of a command prompt. It's handy for sending untraceable messages like 'Fancy a cuppa?'.

Just type: net send username then start typing your message'
gatoula2004

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