What kind of emailer are you?

My personal favourite is the picture of the foreskin being nailed to a floorboard, which manages to both charm and inform (well, I didn’t know you could do that with a foreskin). Recently e-nid and his ilk have faced the sack from employers who haven’t taken well to their cheery pictorial exchanges – humourless, book-burning fascists, the lot of them.

Jeffr-e Archer
Forget your reading glasses. You’ll be better off with a machete because reading his emails requires you to hack through layers of clumsy construction and tedious repetition to reach the sense beneath. The trouble is that when you get there you invariably find it wasn’t worth bothering with in the first place.

Where Clancy has detailed descriptions of the workings of nuclear-powered hunter-killer subs and laser-guided smart bombs, this boy writes about LAN servers, ISDN links and other things I haven’t a bloody clue about.

But, listen up, Hollywood, his emails would probably make excellent action flicks starring Denzel Washington or Harrison Ford (and I understand that Alec Baldwin comes fairly cheap these days).