The ability to negotiate is one of the most valuable skills you can bring to any job. Whether you’re after a pay rise, time off, a new job, getting someone to back off, more help or more recognition, the ability to negotiate will give you a much better chance of success.

Negotiation isn’t just about getting your own way or giving in. In fact, those are the things that happen when people fail to negotiate. If you won’t or can’t negotiate then either you, or the people around you, are likely to end up feeling bitter and resentful. If you’re the boss, you’ll have an unhappy staff. If you’re the junior, you’ll feel downtrodden and used.

Negotiation is about both sides reaching a good outcome, or at least one they feel they can live with and have contributed to. It will almost certainly involve compromise on both sides.

The seven-step negotiation plan:

1. Set out to reach a win-win situation. Both sides should leave the negotiation feeling they’ve come away with something and that they’re satisfied.

2. Always begin by saying something positive and appreciative to the person you’re negotiating with. For instance, ’I’ve noticed how hard you’ve been working,’ or ‘You really did a good job on that report’. It will increase the goodwill on both sides.

3. If the other person is angry or hostile, then refuse to get drawn into it or to fight. Keep smiling and being pleasant and sooner or later they’ll calm down.

4. Get clear about your bottom line. Decide, in advance, what really matters to you and what doesn’t. In other words, where you’ll compromise and where you won’t. Then stick to it.

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The art of negotiation