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How to... Help your child adapt to your returning to work

Not having you around all day every day is a big change for a little one. Do all you can to ease the transition

From How To Do Just About Everything in the Office, in association with eHow (Collins, £9.99)

Steps

1. Give your child time to adapt. He will almost certainly protest if he is suddenly left with someone new. Spend time with your child and their new carer before leaving your child alone with the carer. Then leave the child and carer together for progressively longer. If the childcare is in a new place - the carer's home or a nursery - your child may take longer to get used to it.
2. Be calm, confident and positive at all times. These attitudes communicate themselves to your child and may help to calm him.
3. Take important toys or blankets along to the carer to ensure some continuity. Explain your child's routines, sleep times and mealtimes carefully so that the carer can keep to them as much as possible.
4. Avoid obviously temporary arrangements. If your child is happy with an arrangement, think twice about changing it. If you do need to change childcare, go through the whole process again - do not assume that your child will automatically adapt to new surroundings and people.

Tips
Give yourself time to adapt, too. Initial separation from your child can be hard to deal with; ensure the carer is happy to provide progress reports and will phone you if there are any problems. Put your child first. If he seems happy and thriving with the carer, that's the main thing. Even if a nanny or au pair doesn't do all you would wish in the way of housework, stick with him or her if your child is happy.

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