iVillage logo
Search iVillage
Pregnancy
Parenting
Health
Diet & Fitness
Beauty & Fashion
Relationships
Home & Garden
Food & Drink
Work & Money
Entertainment
Horoscopes
Travel
Work & Money 
  |  Work-Life Balance  |  Working Parents & Carers  |  I've lost my motivation
Advertisement
Topics
Succeeding & Surviving
Finding a Job
Community
Computers and Internet
Money
Office Culture
Starting a business
Work-Life Balance
Family-Friendly Companies
Work-Life Issues
Working Parents & Carers
Work & Maternity
Flexible Working
iVillage shopping

Hot stuff
The urban girl's guide
Make extra cash!
Beat the credit crunch
Put work to bed
Try our Mensa workout
Competitions
Special offers
Newsletters
sign up for FREE!




 
Promotions

I've lost my motivation

by Irene Krechowiecka

question
I have a little boy only a year old and I came back to work after three months of maternity. Before having my son I was known as a workaholic and put 110% into everything and, as a matter of course, was very successful.

Since returning to work I have been very demotivated, only doing what I have to and getting very depressed about being here. The company I work for is a small close-knit firm of men as well as me, so there is no one really to confide in. They are extremely patient with me after my son was very poorly for a while and I had to take some time off. Due to this, I am finding it very hard to confront them with the fact that my objectives and targets need changing to suit the market place and that my wage is suffering because of this.

Due to my lack of motivation I am too willing to sit here and do nothing and I’m getting annoyed with myself for being this way. For months I have put it down to baby blues, but I can’t hide from the fact that I either need to sit down and face the music with the management here or find another job that I can get my teeth into. But then I risk the possibility that my new company may not be as lenient with my hours and time off. Can you help me see the light?

A frustrated mother

answer

One of the many surprising things about having a child is how it can change your perspective. What seemed important before may not be quite so compelling now. On top of that you are probably tired. Think what you used to do after a day at work before your baby was born and compare it to what you do now. Being a working mum is like having two lives and sometimes it’s hard to find the energy and enthusiasm to do justice to either. Add to that hormonal changes that can make you more prone to depression and there are some very good reasons why you feel the way you do.

To move on you have to face up to what’s wrong and start to explore solutions. Does your lack of motivation stem mostly from tiredness, a desire to spend more time with your son or the feeling that your job doesn’t seem as worthwhile as it used to? Once you’ve identified the main reason for your discontent you can start to make changes. Quite small things can make a big difference, like altering the hours you work or dropping some of your responsibilities.

Children are only small for a very short time. A temporary cut in earnings can leave you feeling much richer and happier. What tears you apart is the feeling you are not doing anything properly. Be kinder to yourself and don’t expect to be able to take on the completely new and demanding job of being a mum as well as keeping up your previous level of work performance. Your employer sounds sympathetic, talk it over with him. The company would probably prefer to have a happy motivated you for fewer hours.

Live Q&A on Ask The Expert
Employment lawyer Rachel Lewis advises on your work-related issues

Delicious     Digg     reddit     Facebook     StumbleUpon